Hi All
I will be in London next month until the end of the year and I will like tips on how to get the best out of my stay on a social level.
First off, would like to attend as many games as I could at the Emirates so tips on getting matchday tickets are welcome.
Secondly, would also like to know any popular bars where gunners hang out especially on matchdays.
Finally and possibly the most important, how do I score with the ladies in London? I figure this is one area where the saying horses for courses is most apt
Thanks in advance
London Tips
posted on 30/6/15
comment by The Kaiser's Trainers (U5676)
posted 2 minutes ago
"at Canary Wharf and I gather there are lots of fun places around there."
if you're into women with peenises, pinstripe suits, and banking jobs......well then yes, Canary Wharf is brilliant.
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Yeah, I agree, you'd have to be into that kind of culture to have fun there in my opinion. Its quite a corporate environment.
posted on 30/6/15
I am in the corporate world but in some ways I find it very pretentious so I guess i will have to explore other parts of London as Lado advised. Personally, find most ladies in the corporate environment quite uptight
posted on 30/6/15
how do I score with the ladies in London?
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Hang around the bars around either Bishopsgate or Docklands (particularly West India Quay) on a Friday night, when all the Essex girls come to town half-dressed to get pan-faced and bag a City trader.
After a couple of drinks, they’ve forgotten about the City traders, and by about 10:30pm., the only real requirement is that you have a pulse. From early evening onwards, there’s a series of Slapper Expresses that sets them down at the Bishopsgate exit at Liverpool Street, and they all head off to the nearest All Bar One: it’s like Noah’s Ark for slappers. The more adventurous of them sometimes wend their way down to Shoreditch, as the evening progresses.
You’ll need to distinguish them from the City workers though: some of them look like slappers too, but they won’t be interested in you unless you can prove you’re filthy rich, and by about 8pm they’ll have moved on to the West End, or to home. They’re not as inviting as they sometimes look, so It’ll just be an exercise in window-shopping if you waste your time with them.
And don’t tell them you’re a Gooner, as they’ll assume you’re gay, and lose interest
posted on 30/6/15
Wessie Road
And that last line had me in stitches. Thanks for the tips!
posted on 30/6/15
LADS
posted on 30/6/15
comment by The Missionary-Spreading the Gospel of Arsenal (U3370)
posted 4 hours, 1 minute ago
Many thanks, Lado! Glad to know your suggested approach isn't so different from what i am used to. I will be staying by my lonesome at Canary Wharf and I gather there are lots of fun places around there. True?
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I worked in the Wharf for years and it's easy to pull there. Hoards of women (mostly from Essex) descend upon the place on Thursday and Friday night looking for rich guys to sleep with. The best bar for that is "the parlour" which is situated at bottom of 1 Canada Square. If you are working in the city or Wharf then you are sorted. If not then put on a suit and you are good to go!
Word of warning, don't bother going out round canary Wharf on a Saturday it's dead. If you want to pull on the weekend then head to Clapham which is amazing (try infernos for the easy girls, many from Australia nz or locals or try northcote Road for the posher but more hard work ones). Another great place for pulling is Shoreditch although it's become a bit of a sausage fest recently I've heard as it's become so popular.
posted on 30/6/15
Haha just seen wessie road's post, now you know the Essex thing must true op
posted on 30/6/15
Approach any female and tell her that you asked the LADS on JA606 for the best way to end up in her knickers. Garuntee you pull more slush than you can trot through. You'll have a bell thats been rang more times than notre dame by the end of your trip.
Forget condoms, you're gonna need wellies.
By the end of this trip your sack will be so empty it feels like your balls are turning inside out. They'll be weightless, but you'll feel like Michelle McManus is re-enacting the Wrecking ball video inside your sagging, fleshy rucksack.
Carpet burns and sore thighs. Your fore-skin will droop over like gandalfs cloak, while the japseye burns so much it feels like Saurons eye.
Although, maybe you could just leave out the oart where you asked for advice on the internet.
posted on 30/6/15
Comment Deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 1/7/15
Just walk up to a girl and say "fat penguin", that should break the ice.