The night I first met my wife she was talking about how she was learning German.
To impress her I told her the only German I know..
"Ich habe ein Schlafzimmer"
I thought it meant, I have a garage. It didn't.
Oli McBurnie going for £20m is the best joke I've seen recently.
Used to care about the Scotland team. Had many great trips abroad as a supporter, in spite of the results nearly always being "disappointing". Being in Prague for Avril's 6-4-0 was kinda the beginning of the end of my real interest though. Been less and less bothered since, to the point I might not even watch us on the box. Just very little worth supporting these days, and I honestly don't see it changing any time soon, with the dinosaurs running our game.
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
comment by Admin1 (U1)
posted 22 minutes ago
The night I first met my wife she was talking about how she was learning German.
To impress her I told her the only German I know..
"Ich habe ein Schlafzimmer"
I thought it meant, I have a garage. It didn't.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Sure she’s heard it all before.
I once told a group of lassies I was gay. Instantly they adopted me and I had to spend all night inventing stories of my intolerant family, how hard it was coming out, how I couldn’t find a nice guy etc.
It was exhausting. And of course eventually I got off with the faghaggiest of them as ‘I’d never even tried kissing a girl before’.
Eventually one of my friends told them I’d been lying all night. They were facking raging. The one I’d kissed never returned my calls in the next few days.
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
comment by PointyBirds (U21890)
posted 21 minutes ago
I once told a group of lassies I was gay. Instantly they adopted me and I had to spend all night inventing stories of my intolerant family, how hard it was coming out, how I couldn’t find a nice guy etc.
It was exhausting. And of course eventually I got off with the faghaggiest of them as ‘I’d never even tried kissing a girl before’.
Eventually one of my friends told them I’d been lying all night. They were facking raging. The one I’d kissed never returned my calls in the next few days.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
i tried that one when id slept with 2 lassies who turned out to be pals and id slung them. Said the reason i couldnt go out with either of them because i was gay.
Hahaha. “Now if you’d only take it up the erse, I could pretend...”
"how hard it was coming out"
How hard was it going in though that's all that matters
<matron>
While we are on important topics.
What is the maximum amount of work time you can reasonably get away with taking up for a dump?
I hate dumping at work. You never know what might happen later on.
I'm genuinely disappointed when I don't poo at work.
comment by IvanGolacIsMagic (U5291)
posted 19 minutes ago
I'm genuinely disappointed when I don't poo at work.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Exactly mate, if you can get paid to do a schite then it would be foolish not too.
I'll hold off in the morning until i get in
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International Fitbaw
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posted on 5/9/19
The night I first met my wife she was talking about how she was learning German.
To impress her I told her the only German I know..
"Ich habe ein Schlafzimmer"
I thought it meant, I have a garage. It didn't.
posted on 5/9/19
Oli McBurnie going for £20m is the best joke I've seen recently.
Used to care about the Scotland team. Had many great trips abroad as a supporter, in spite of the results nearly always being "disappointing". Being in Prague for Avril's 6-4-0 was kinda the beginning of the end of my real interest though. Been less and less bothered since, to the point I might not even watch us on the box. Just very little worth supporting these days, and I honestly don't see it changing any time soon, with the dinosaurs running our game.
posted on 5/9/19
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 5/9/19
comment by Admin1 (U1)
posted 22 minutes ago
The night I first met my wife she was talking about how she was learning German.
To impress her I told her the only German I know..
"Ich habe ein Schlafzimmer"
I thought it meant, I have a garage. It didn't.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Sure she’s heard it all before.
posted on 5/9/19
I once told a group of lassies I was gay. Instantly they adopted me and I had to spend all night inventing stories of my intolerant family, how hard it was coming out, how I couldn’t find a nice guy etc.
It was exhausting. And of course eventually I got off with the faghaggiest of them as ‘I’d never even tried kissing a girl before’.
Eventually one of my friends told them I’d been lying all night. They were facking raging. The one I’d kissed never returned my calls in the next few days.
posted on 5/9/19
Comment deleted by Site Moderator
posted on 5/9/19
comment by PointyBirds (U21890)
posted 21 minutes ago
I once told a group of lassies I was gay. Instantly they adopted me and I had to spend all night inventing stories of my intolerant family, how hard it was coming out, how I couldn’t find a nice guy etc.
It was exhausting. And of course eventually I got off with the faghaggiest of them as ‘I’d never even tried kissing a girl before’.
Eventually one of my friends told them I’d been lying all night. They were facking raging. The one I’d kissed never returned my calls in the next few days.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
i tried that one when id slept with 2 lassies who turned out to be pals and id slung them. Said the reason i couldnt go out with either of them because i was gay.
posted on 5/9/19
Hahaha. “Now if you’d only take it up the erse, I could pretend...”
posted on 5/9/19
You two are fkn unreal
posted on 5/9/19
"how hard it was coming out"
How hard was it going in though that's all that matters
<matron>
posted on 5/9/19
While we are on important topics.
What is the maximum amount of work time you can reasonably get away with taking up for a dump?
posted on 5/9/19
I hate dumping at work. You never know what might happen later on.
posted on 5/9/19
I'm genuinely disappointed when I don't poo at work.
posted on 5/9/19
comment by IvanGolacIsMagic (U5291)
posted 19 minutes ago
I'm genuinely disappointed when I don't poo at work.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Exactly mate, if you can get paid to do a schite then it would be foolish not too.
I'll hold off in the morning until i get in
Page 1 of 1