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A wee joke

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posted on 12/9/19

Did it come with rice quackers?

posted on 12/9/19

comment by Finlay Robertson (U1734)
posted 52 seconds ago
Did it come with rice quackers?
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No, prawn quackers 😂

comment by Schro (U9373)

posted on 12/9/19

Hope you got something off the bill.

posted on 12/9/19

Comment deleted by Site Moderator

posted on 12/9/19

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/o6zod/the_tourettes_pianist/

Posted link a while ago but worth a repeat post - one of the funniest jokes I’ve heard (read)

posted on 12/9/19

https://images.app.goo.gl/jwuqiG7q8aj463vx6

posted on 12/9/19

A wee joke?

You're taking the P!ss

posted on 12/9/19

my local chinese takeaway went on fire, poor chef had to jump from a 1st storey window, on a freezing cold night.



apparently there was a nip in the air.

posted on 12/9/19

Comment deleted by Site Moderator

posted on 12/9/19

A farmer walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says 'This is the pig that I have to fack when you don't want secs'. The farmers wife says 'I think you'll find that's a sheep'. The farmer says 'I think you'll find I was talking to the sheep'.

posted on 12/9/19

A white horse walks in to a bar and says to the barman 'pint of Guiness, please'. The barman replies ' I'm surprised you drinking Guiness when there is a whisky named after you'. Surprised horse says 'whit, Eric?'

posted on 12/9/19

Did you hear about the indian swimming pool attendant?

Didya handyabandin

posted on 12/9/19

Ed, Edd and Edouard (U12969)
posted 14 minutes ago

Did you hear about the indian swimming pool attendant?

Didya handyabandin




indian cloakroom attendant


Mahat Macoat

posted on 12/9/19

comment by Leon💀 (U3432)
posted 4 minutes ago
Ed, Edd and Edouard (U12969)
posted 14 minutes ago

Did you hear about the indian swimming pool attendant?

Didya handyabandin




indian cloakroom attendant


Mahat Macoat
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I just told all the boys in the office that yin, went down a treat

posted on 12/9/19

Indian karaoke singer

Gurruptha Singh

comment by Hector (U3606)

posted on 12/9/19

What do you call a man with a hotel on his head? Norman Tebbitt.

Just throwing this in as my effort to this 'vintage, oldie but goodie ' thread.

comment by atheist (U2783)

posted on 12/9/19

What do you call a man with a hotel on his head? Norman Tebbitt
.................

comment by Faither (U3393)

posted on 12/9/19

How do you know Lord Mountbatten didn't have dandruff?

Because they found his head and shoulders on the beach

posted on 12/9/19

comment by Leon💀 (U3432)
posted 3 hours, 20 minutes ago
my local chinese takeaway went on fire, poor chef had to jump from a 1st storey window, on a freezing cold night.



apparently there was a nip in the air.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Hmmm...would need to be a Japanese restaurant for that joke to really work.

You're a disgrace to racists everywhere.

comment by Faither (U3393)

posted on 12/9/19

posted on 12/9/19

Circus couple decide they want to adopt.
Social work people not too keen so they pop up to see them.
And are impressed with their 50 foot mobile home with all the mod cons.
'What about education' they ask.
'No problem we'll employ a full time tutor'
'And hygeine and welfare'
'Again no problem we'll employ a professional nanny with all the qualifications'
'Ok that all seems satisfactory. What age group did you have in mind '
'Not too worried about the age. As long as he can fit in the cannon'

comment by Hector (U3606)

posted on 12/9/19

comment by Magnum (U16400)
posted 1 hour, 9 minutes ago
comment by Leon💀 (U3432)
posted 3 hours, 20 minutes ago
my local chinese takeaway went on fire, poor chef had to jump from a 1st storey window, on a freezing cold night.



apparently there was a nip in the air.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Hmmm...would need to be a Japanese restaurant for that joke to really work.

You're a disgrace to racists everywhere.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
The preamble that I heard for that punchline...

"Brrr its a bit Pearl harbour this morning"

"What?"

" Theres a nasty nip in the air"

posted on 12/9/19

comment by Hector (U3606)
posted 8 minutes ago
comment by Magnum (U16400)
posted 1 hour, 9 minutes ago
comment by Leon💀 (U3432)
posted 3 hours, 20 minutes ago
my local chinese takeaway went on fire, poor chef had to jump from a 1st storey window, on a freezing cold night.



apparently there was a nip in the air.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Hmmm...would need to be a Japanese restaurant for that joke to really work.

You're a disgrace to racists everywhere.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
The preamble that I heard for that punchline...

"Brrr its a bit Pearl harbour this morning"

"What?"

" Theres a nasty nip in the air"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
That's more like it.

Or prince Philip on finding our that young Charles had been into his good whisky

'There's a nip in the heir'

comment by Hector (U3606)

posted on 12/9/19



Less controversial!

posted on 12/9/19

Comment deleted by Site Moderator

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