Hello to fans of both football clubs. As you are probably aware, Arsenal have made a bid for Gary Cahill. Let's face it, the bid was akin to walking into a Ferrari dealership and offering a Curly Wurly for the top of the range model. Insulting.
I can only assume that Arsenal are short on cash, and i'm a kind guy. I once gave a homeless man a Subway sandwich. 6 quid those things cost! Almost as bad as Starbucks.
As i said, i'm a kind guy. I propose a charity drive (I'm mainly hoping Manche$ter City fans read this), where us fellow fans of football pledge to donate whatever we can to help out the poor London club. I'm not rich, by any stretch of the imagination. However, I'm a kind man.
I formally pledge a box of old VHS tapes. Some will be full of such vintage classics as 'Blind Date', and 'Last Of The Summer Wine'. I also want to offer several old 50p's. You know, the big ones that could crack a skull. Finally, I also want to offer an old laptop. I have no idea what kind of viruses will be on there, but to be honest there's going to be some bad ones.
I fully believe this will benefit the football club, as they so clearly need the cash. Now dig deep people, how can you help Arsenal out?
Arsenal FC Donation Fund
posted on 26/8/11
I can donate "The Peter Serafinowicz Show" on DVD
Includes all the Brian Butterfield sketches
posted on 26/8/11
I have an old VHS tape of Dumb & Dumber.
I will donate that as I have it on DVD now!
posted on 26/8/11
Car boot sale at Man Utd game won't work, there is no way the United fans would help out fellow Cockneys!!
posted on 26/8/11
Ooooh St Charles! Come on, what can you Owls donate? DO NOT offer Gary Megson, please.
posted on 26/8/11
Hello St Charles Sir, hope your well..
Don't forget United can only buy small things...
Those guys at Ryanair are murder with case size..
posted on 26/8/11
Crazy Campo, I could offer you half our team but it wouldn't be worth much!! On second thoughts we could give you about 20,000 empty blue stadium seats, most are about 15 years old but are almost as good as new as they have hardly been used!!
Mallorca, if the United fans can only take back small things, then I have the perfect item, Gary Megson's "Attacking Tactics and Formations When 1-0 Up Book". My understanding is that even though the cover has this title on it, the pages are actually empty so you could use it for anything!!
posted on 26/8/11
Knew you find out!!!
posted on 26/8/11
I'll give you a penny chew, a plastic whistle, a pot of glue, for your milky way, what do you saaaaaaaaay?!
....NO!
posted on 27/8/11
I hereby donate a copy of massive jugs weekly (the one with a 1940's toby of Winston Churchill on the cover - shame on you if you thought i meant something else), last week's daily mail TV magazine thingie, a DVD of 101 greatest backpasses narrated by Gary Megson, and a stack of old car park passes from the reebok car park.
posted on 27/8/11
I would like to donate a pair of my old Timberland sandals. Recently My main soil pipe broke and unfortunately it was broken behind the steps to my pool terrace. As it had been broken for some time, you can imagine what I found when I took a sledge hammer to the wall. Yes, it was full of the brown smelly stuff and urine.
Well to cut a long story short, the plumber wouldn't clear the mess so it was up to yours truly. Not being a very practical man and besides which, the temperature was up in the 30s C. I was wearing the said sandals. I don't think you want to imagine what were sandals were full by the time I had finished but they were.
I had a really vigorous shower when I had finished but the sandals were never washed so I would like to donate them to the Arsenal cause.
You know what they say, Where there's muck there's money. Good luck Mr. Wenger.