The Most Beautiful Girl in The World

comment by *Momo’s Goggles (U22339)
posted 1 minute ago
Sit down pee is the way forward. Especially if you have kids. I sometimes pretend I’m having a shįt to buy 15 mins to myself
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😂 Genius

You live on your own:
You leave the seat up because you will need it more that way than the seat down.
The lid does nothing hygiene-wise because there are air-gaps under the seat anyway.
When you are married/living together
the Missus likes the seat/lid down so when she gets out of her bath/shower she can plonk her tired ass down on the lid to wrap her hair in the other towel that she always takes to the bathroom. Obviously after a strenuous hair-washing she will be tired but even Pavlov's dogs could have learned how to put a toilet seat down. Yeah, Pavlov's dogs got a reward when they got it right. What would the wife get? Well you ladies wanted equality, you expect me to put the seat up when I have a pee so why don't you do the same when you have finished because you know I'm probably going to be next to use it.
If Coronavirus hadn't happened this issue was due for debate in the House of Commons in September.

I remember graffiti on the walls of a toilet cubicle that I desperately had to use in Waterloo railway station in the early 70's. Access to the cubicle was an old penny in a slot.
"Here I sit, broken-hearted, paid my penny and only fa*ted.

Did I mention That I stand up to sh!t

comment by goadocwatson (U1016)
posted 2 hours, 11 minutes ago
I remember graffiti on the walls of a toilet cubicle that I desperately had to use in Waterloo railway station in the early 70's. Access to the cubicle was an old penny in a slot.
"Here I sit, broken-hearted, paid my penny and only fa*ted.
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But at least some one who had diarrhoea like you are sharing it was money well spent.

If you have a bathroom with a toilet and sink etc in the same room and you have your toothbrush exposed it picks up germs from an open toilet. Quite a lot of germs actually, basically brushing your teeth in shat particles.

comment by *Momo’s Goggles (U22339)
posted 8 hours, 12 minutes ago
Sit down pee is the way forward. Especially if you have kids. I sometimes pretend I’m having a shįt to buy 15 mins to myself
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This exactly.

Cotton. It will be great when they allow you 4th formers back to school. You've just broken the truce!

comment by *Momo’s Goggles (U22339)
posted 12 hours, 3 minutes ago
Sit down pee is the way forward. Especially if you have kids. I sometimes pretend I’m having a shįt to buy 15 mins to myself
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I'm not gonna lie, I've done this myself. "Daddy can you...". "Hold on I'm going to the toilet". Finished five minutes ago but ffs give me a break from the 'can yous'.

Just this morning we were doing one of our several daily play fights and he just doesn't know when to end. It's been an hour, you win, I'm dead. No, I'm the red ninja and you're the bad black ninja and I have to punish you. No I'm good now, I promise! No, you're still bad, heyaa! OK...I need to use the bathroom.

Your children bring out the best and the worst in you. They make you a liar at first - Yes there is a Santa, Yes there is a Tooth Fairy. So as they grow up and get a bit wiser how can we expect them to believe the sound and proper advice we try to give them? If you have any bigotry your kids are likely to inherit that. What you say or do will probably shape their lives.