It wasn't a Tuesday.

So it doesn't count.

The truth remains unaltered.

A tippy-tappy nonsense Liga team would never be able to hack it in Stoke on a wet and windy TUESDAY night in mid-February.

Neither would Messi - goes without saying really.

PL rules, ok.


Acknowledgements:

This article would not have been possible without the ever-wise and incisive contributions of Adam 'Pinky' Pinkerton of Pinkerton Manor.