A, d and e.

Against Chelsea when RVP scored the forth goal, I was like "meh we will concede anyway but at least we won't lose." When he score the fifth I was ringing and laughing at all my Chelsea mates screaming "I TOLD YOU SO" even though I never told them so. I'm an ass like that

I start with a attempting to jump up, realising that my ol' knees can't take it any longer and then i just put both my hands up.

I then know we'll give up the lead and sit quietly.

f) raise my eyebrows and declare, 'they still have time to **** it up.' sad but true.

a) definitely. If I'm near a table then I'll start thumping that as well.

Against Chelsea it was definitely B for the 3rd and 4th, before a bit of D and E.

You are all clearly insane

I smile and nod my head in appreciation, but then I spare a thought for the goalie

"f) raise my eyebrows and declare, 'they still have time to **** it up.' sad but true."

I said this when we played Pool at the Emirates last season watching the match with one of my mates who supported United and he kept telling me to shut up. Then as soon as Eboué gave away the penalty he wouldn't stop laughing at me. I wanted to cry

Strangely enough i didn't celebrate at all for the first 3 goals.

We've got Sky Sports HD and were happily watching the match when i heard an almighty cry from the bloke next door.

You read right...NEXT DOOR!

3 secs later we scored! I was so shocked i didn't really have time to celebrate.

I did celebrate for the 1st goal quite a bit because I expected us to crumble after Lampard scored.

I quietly cheered to myself inside my head while I was sat in a meeting with some developers while sneakily updating BBC live text on my phone under the table

a)