Gillian Balaclavaguy Says Hello

Hello.

I am Gillian Balaclavaguy and I am the world's most respected, bearded footballing wizard when it comes to stating footballing twaddle. My god my beard is so beautiful, it's sculpted to perfection like Michaelangelo's David.....David? DAVID DUNN!!!!!

News just breaking in my head is that David Dunn is unhappy at starring in a ridiculous advert for Venkey's and has slapped in a transfer request. The Blackburn manager was to drunk to comment on this recent development.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, I hope to be gracing this fine forum and keeping you in the loop when it comes to all the transfer happenings whether you like it or not. I'll be popping up at every opportune moment when a full of himself know it all is required to pretend like he knows every football machination that has ever occurred.

Excuse me, I've just got a message. "Get some milk for my Rice Krispies Gillian and make sure to pick up some custard creams as well." Rice Krispies!? They're krispy and made of rice.......rice sounds like nice......warm weather is nice isn't it?

Hmmm.......TONY HIBBERT TO REAL MADRID FOR FORTY MILLION WHILE DAVID MOYES BRINGS IN RAMOS WHICH CAUSES JOSE MOURINHO TO CRY SLIGHTLY WHICH IN TURN HAS THE EFFECT OF RICARDO CARVALHO HUGGING HIS MENTOR AND EXPRESSING HIS DEEP LOVE FOR HIM WHILE STUBBING HIS TOE AND FORCING REAL TO BRING IN GARY CAHILL AS A TOE DONOR!!!!!!!

If you want any top secret info on player dealings then let me know while also praising my immaculately groomed facial hair.