Wanted to get some opinions, thoughts and perspective from the JA606 professionals on here.
My mum's sisters husband passed away today so my uncle and I classed him as another dad as we all grew up as a close family and spent a lot of time together. Naturally your sadness and grief will be different in any situation to that of others.
What's people's views or their work policies around time off in this situation?
Our policy is very much a unless its immediate you need to take leave or unpaid which I think is a load of tosh. Luckily my manager doesn't follow the rule book in these situations so gets it but I imagine it may not be the same for others.
Maybe it's a cultural thing but in Hindu culture the death rites continue for 12 days where various ceremonies take place which I assume will be the same for other cultures and beliefs that maybe the companies don't quite grasp?
Thoughts or views appreciated.
Death and Work...
posted on 16/1/24
I have been lucky with my 2 different employers (A Uni and now a more corporate one) where when I have had a bereavement they just say ‘take as much time as you need’ on full pay.
For me this is the way employers should be.
posted on 16/1/24
If a member of staff has suffered a bereavement, even for pets, then they should be able to take the time off they need within reason
posted on 16/1/24
comment by Never Mind the Defending: Here’s Jürgen Klopp’s Liverpool (U3979)
posted 4 minutes ago
If a member of staff has suffered a bereavement, even for pets, then they should be able to take the time off they need within reason
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For pets? No chance, I draw the line there, if someone wants time off because their gerbil has died they can take it out of their leave.
posted on 16/1/24
Commiserations. Losing a relative that isn't a close relative biologically but close emotionally are the hardest when it comes to that compassionate leave discussion at work.
I would recommend not returning to work until you feel in the right headspace, even if that means sacrificing a couple of days annual leave.
posted on 16/1/24
comment by Ace (U14461)
if someone wants time off because their gerbil has died they can take it out of their leave.
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they may have to take it out of their @sshole first
posted on 17/1/24
comment by Don Draper's dandruff (U20155)
posted 9 hours, 45 minutes ago
comment by Ace (U14461)
if someone wants time off because their gerbil has died they can take it out of their leave.
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they may have to take it out of their @sshole first
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My dad died in 84 aged 49 at work...I was in the Armed Forces then...I had about two weeks off...mind you that was because my mum had absolutely no clue where anything was or what to do, or how the house worked...
Parents eh
posted on 17/1/24
You can see that it depends on how 'good' your employer is - some will be more empathetic than others, and some will have clear policies in place, whilst others will just make it up.
And in the same way, people cope differently with bereavement - it's not a criticism if it takes some longer than others to cope, we're all different. Some people will be very 'matter of fact' with it, others are more emotional.
You'll kind of know when it's the right time to go back to work, and I would say, 'seek whatever help' you need out there, if you do need it - I think we are a society where talking about death is still a fairly taboo subject and we just keep everything bottled in.
But sorry to hear about your loss - I guess grieving is just part of life, but it's still a crap time for you.
posted on 17/1/24
Firstly appreciate the condolences.
I just wanted to gage people's thoughts / experiences in this type of scenario so been helpful reading people's experiences.
posted on 17/1/24
I have 7 people reporting to me and I let them disappear for a bit even if it's their uncle, nan, grandad, auntie, etc.
It shouldn't matter really should it?
My nan was like a second mum to me, lived with me and my parents for almost 10 years before she passed.
Company policy says because she isn't immediate family then tough sh!t. So yeah, this stuff is kept under the radar from HR etc but fk HR (all useless cants anyway) and fk company policy.
I usually give them some time but tell them to keep their work phone on them just in case I need to get hold of them.
posted on 17/1/24
Condolences, never an easy time.
I'm lucky and unlucky. My company is as tight as the proverbial nun's chuff and compassionate leave is 2 days. My boss however is great, last year my dad died and his response was simply - take as long as you need.
He was the same with paternity leave, company policy is two days. He just said to me - congratulations, see you in 2 weeks.
Lesson here; if you find yourself in a position where you get to make these types of decision - don't be a d*ck, show a bit of compassion.