My fisherman uncle was mysteriously murdered. Police investigations only led to red herrings. If there's any breakthrough, they said they'd let minnow. Seems fishy, my hunch is that it was the loan shark.
This is a good plaice for such humour
comment by Inbefore (U20589)
posted 3 hours, 11 minutes ago
My fisherman uncle was mysteriously murdered. Police investigations only led to red herrings. If there's any breakthrough, they said they'd let minnow. Seems fishy, my hunch is that it was the loan shark.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
What a load of carp!
If he left a will, - as the nephew are you the sole beneficiary?
If they charge someone for the murder, hopefully the scales of justice will prevail
I mean maybe he wasn't even murdered.
Maybe it was an accident and The perpetrator didn't actually kill him on porpoise
I'm sure the law will prevail in the end for the good of hu - manitee
The late Alex Salmon would have got answers.
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 1 day, 1 hour ago
If he left a will, - as the nephew are you the sole beneficiary?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 2 minutes ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Acknowledged
Dr Strange is pretty normal
comment by 1manontherun 7-0 (U4291)
posted 9 minutes ago
Dr Strange is pretty normal
----------------------------------------------------------------------
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Aisle acknowledge that in a minute
comment by Pun (U21588)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Aisle acknowledge that in a minute
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I like it...
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 15 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Acknowledged
comment by Pun (U21588)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Aisle acknowledge that in a minute
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Don’t leave it till it’s too late
A woman is having a pelvic exam at the doctors. The doctor says,
"You have the biggest v**ina I have ever seen".
"You have the biggest v**ina I have ever seen".
Offended, the woman tells the doctor he didn't have to say it twice. The doctor says,
"I didn't I didn't I didn't....."
A word of advice: If you run a cat shelter, never let Schroedinger adopt one.
Sign in if you want to comment
OnlyPuns (and other jokes)
Page 283 of 286
282 | 283 | 284 | 285 | 286
posted on 11/3/25
Acknowledged
posted on 21/3/25
My fisherman uncle was mysteriously murdered. Police investigations only led to red herrings. If there's any breakthrough, they said they'd let minnow. Seems fishy, my hunch is that it was the loan shark.
posted on 21/3/25
Acknowledged
posted on 21/3/25
This is a good plaice for such humour
posted on 21/3/25
comment by Inbefore (U20589)
posted 3 hours, 11 minutes ago
My fisherman uncle was mysteriously murdered. Police investigations only led to red herrings. If there's any breakthrough, they said they'd let minnow. Seems fishy, my hunch is that it was the loan shark.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
What a load of carp!
posted on 21/3/25
These cod not be better
posted on 21/3/25
If he left a will, - as the nephew are you the sole beneficiary?
posted on 21/3/25
If they charge someone for the murder, hopefully the scales of justice will prevail
posted on 21/3/25
I mean maybe he wasn't even murdered.
Maybe it was an accident and The perpetrator didn't actually kill him on porpoise
posted on 21/3/25
I'm sure the law will prevail in the end for the good of hu - manitee
posted on 21/3/25
The late Alex Salmon would have got answers.
posted on 21/3/25
All acknowledged
posted on 22/3/25
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 1 day, 1 hour ago
If he left a will, - as the nephew are you the sole beneficiary?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
posted on 23/3/25
Bream me up, Scotty.
posted on 23/3/25
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
posted on 23/3/25
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 2 minutes ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Acknowledged
posted on 1/4/25
Dr Strange is pretty normal
posted on 1/4/25
comment by 1manontherun 7-0 (U4291)
posted 9 minutes ago
Dr Strange is pretty normal
----------------------------------------------------------------------
posted on 1/4/25
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
posted on 1/4/25
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Aisle acknowledge that in a minute
posted on 1/4/25
comment by Pun (U21588)
posted 1 minute ago
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Aisle acknowledge that in a minute
----------------------------------------------------------------------
I like it...
posted on 1/4/25
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 15 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Acknowledged
posted on 1/4/25
comment by Pun (U21588)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Sheriff JW Pepper (U1007)
posted 7 minutes ago
comment by Boris 'Inky’ Gibson (U5901)
posted 1 week, 2 days ago
Just bought the new Humpty Dumpty toy from my local supermarket.
Came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
This Asda be the most convaluted Lidl joke on here in ages
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Aisle acknowledge that in a minute
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Don’t leave it till it’s too late
posted on 7/4/25
A woman is having a pelvic exam at the doctors. The doctor says,
"You have the biggest v**ina I have ever seen".
"You have the biggest v**ina I have ever seen".
Offended, the woman tells the doctor he didn't have to say it twice. The doctor says,
"I didn't I didn't I didn't....."
posted on 12/4/25
A word of advice: If you run a cat shelter, never let Schroedinger adopt one.
Page 283 of 286
282 | 283 | 284 | 285 | 286